I Am Drowning Here, Did Anyone Notice?
Have you ever felt like you just aren't smart enough to help your child navigate through their dyslexia journey? I sure have. I feel this way often even though I know I am capable,prepared and now, after 13 years of working in this field, an expert. The constant stress of "Did I do enough?" keeps creeping into my mind to haunt me.
This is 504 and IEP season and one of the most stressful times of year for families who approach the world in a more holistic manner. I am currently working with multiple families as an coach/ advocate and sadly I hear the same story day after day, month after month, year after year. It breaks my heart and sometimes I have to just zone out, resorting to Seinfield or the Office, to get my mind off of the unbearable pain.
There is no answer as to why this has to be so difficult. The idea that we are fighting with the educators to educate our children is mind blowing. Why do we have to explain learning disabilities to the school? It is important you know you are NOT ALONE. This journey is well traveled and the suffering is far reaching. Being the advocate and even sometimes the teacher, is not for the faint of heart, you didn't sign up for it but here it is. Years and years of always trying to just keep ones head above water is exhausting and at times feels hopeless. I have been there many times and know you have too. I hear the exhaustion, hopelessness and the desperation everyday and feel those feelings too. You are not crazy or incompetent. YOU ARE A SAINT!
This invisable difference makes isolation a reality. People who can't see the disability just never " get it". We need a support system to be able to out last the school system. Take time to talk to other parents who truly do understand the PTSD
( Present Tramatic Stress Disorder- I made that up) of being the decison maker and champion for a child who has dyslexia. This is a lifetime role and will likely roll into grandchildren as well. I know you can do it because I watch and listen to the stories of the most amazing women I know. They give every fiber of their being to help their child reach their full potential.
The hidden gift is- you know your child. Few parents do know their children very well anymore. Your blessing is you do know them well and have the benefit of being in their presence a lot so....
ENJOY THE RIDE!
Do whatever it takes: talking with friends, visiting the Dslexia Support Group on line, watching a movie, going outside to get fresh air and perspective, or maybe like I do when times are tough- go into the middle of a field and scream until I can't scream any more. Just figure it out! There is comfort in knowing there are thousands of others feeling the same and doing the same to survive. You are earning your angel wings as our kids are elevated to saints! You are in this together, we are all in this together and we can and will find a way!
I GET YOU and you are remarkable!.
Hang in there, your child is awesome and because you are involoved and supporting them, focusing on them as a whole person, they will SOAR and someday you will get some sleep:)